Snape's Secret Admirer(it's not nice to eavesdrop)
by Richal
Summary: You know, it's not very nice to eavesdrop. You should never think that you have the authority to either. besides, you might find out something you never wanted to know, and this is what happened to poor ol' Snape. Read to find out!note: most characters
1. Ch. 1 Admiration

Snape and his Secret Admirers  
Professor Snape stalked quietly down the hallway on the second floor, waaiting to pounce on the nearest rule breaker:  
a second-year Ravenclaw boy past curfew. " 5 points from Ravenclaw, and don't let me see you out after curfew again,   
or it'll be detention with Filch." Snape spat. The boy, obviously frightened, scurried off. Snape was pleased with himself.   
He enjoyed being intimidating, it lets the students know who's in charge. Snape started slinking around, peeking around  
the corners before turning them, which was lucky for him, because he almost ran into two girls, probably in about their  
5th year. They were deep in conversatioin about something, precicely which Snape was going to find out.   
"Oh he's so dreammmy!" one of them gushed. both of them were in a position in which they couldn't see him,  
so he poked one eye around the corner. It was okay to eavesdrop, as long as it's a student. At least, that was   
Snape's theory.   
"I know! I found another picture of him on a bulletin board, and took it before any of the Gryffindor boys could   
draw on it. Oh, if he was only nice to us in potions class...."  
"I know, and got his hair cut..." they both gave loving sighs. Snape was mortified. He continued to listen, though, just in  
case they weren't talking about him. But hte next sentence he hearg gave them away.   
"Severus is such a beautiful, unique name....." said one airily. That was enough for Snape. They were probably playing  
some sort of prank on him. He just about turned the corner, but the girls did first. It was nearly impossible which face showed  
more horror. But girls turned bright red and scampered away, crying, before he could question them or take points. Snape shook  
his head and rubbed his eyes. Not a dull moment at this school, he thought.  
  
  
*Most character's belong to J.K. Rowling. I am merely using them for my/your amusement.* 


	2. Ch. 2 Think before you speak

Ch. 2 Never offend a girl  
The next morning Snape woke up, completely forgetting about the girl incident. He put on his usual black and went  
down to the great hall for breakfast. Dumbledore was talking to McGonagall. If there's anything I can't stand besides Potter  
and the gang, It's Albus flirting with Minerva. He felt sick just thinking about it. Then he remembered about last night's  
incident. He began scanning the room for the faces from last night that were instilled in his brain. He was expecting one  
of two things; either it was 2 Gryffindors playing a trick, (which he would have to punish severly) or maybe 2 Slytherins  
who were very embarassed. or maybe, vice versa... But Snape was so deep in thought that he completely blocked  
everything else out, including anyone trying to talk to him. "SEVERUS!" Snape nearly jumped out of his skin.  
"whaaat?" he hissed, turning to where the voice came. "Oh. Sorry Professor Dumbledore." Snape looked down.   
He hated it when he did that. "Quite alright. I have two young Slytherin girls wanting to speak to you, if you'd please   
follow me." Oh boy. It was probably 2 Slytherins who had played a joke, and he'd have to deduct points to please  
Dumbledore. Great. They turned a few corners, then reached a place where 2 girls were standing nervously. Snape didn't  
look at them, but burst into talk. " I don't know what you thought you were pulling. You should've known   
better than to do such a thing.." Snape continued to rant on and on about even though he was good looking, they shouldn't   
play a dirty trick like that on him again. the girls were dumbstruck. "What ARE you talking about professor?" The other girl was  
on the floor, rolling with laughter. Snape was confused. Weren't these the two girls he has seen last night? Apparently not,  
he thought looking at them for the first time. Snape pointed his finder down the hall. "Wait a minute... Is'nt that Lockheart?!"  
The girls turned to look, and Snape scampered away. He resumed his usual seat and scarfed down the remaining food on his  
plate, then ran down to the dungeons. He burst through the door. His first class was already there. Most unluckily, It was  
the 5th year Slytherin and Gryffindors. He began, "Today we will be making..." What WAS it that he had planned? Had he   
even planned this class?!?! he ran to his dest and flipped open the guide to the 5th year book. "...A Restless Poison. Do  
not TEST this potion on yourself." He stated the obvious and looked at Longbottom. Malfoy and company sniggered.   
He began listing the ingredients on the board. He floated to the back of the room and looked at Potter, Weasley and Granger  
to make sure they weren't up to something. But they were talking far too much, so he decided to do what he did best and,  
you guessed it, eavesdrop. Potter was talking to Weasley, saying, " He's never been this unorganized before... I wonder what  
he's up to..." then Ms. Granger cut in. "Oh come on you two. Every time you suspect him for something, he never ends up  
to have done anything-"   
" I believe Ms. Granger is correct, like usual. 5 points from Gryffindor. Now get to work." A smile spread over his face  
as he walked away. He loved taking points from those three. Now he could start preparing for his next lesson. But instead,   
He started to think of the incidents of last night. He actually hoped that the girls were admirers, as weird as that sounds.   
He'd never had a dream come true.... oh no, he thought, don't get that song in your head. The bell rang and the class  
ran to the door. " I want a 3 page essay on this potion by Wednesday." As they left, Snape checked his schedule. 5th  
year Hufflepuff and Ravenclaw.... This was his chance to find the 2 girls. At least, that's what he thought. 


	3. Ch. 3 The Final Chapter

Ch. 3 (final chapter) Surprise surprise  
Snape looked around uneasily. He didn't feel much like himself lately. Those Stupid Girls had gone and messed things up.   
Snape pretended to work as he scanned the faces of the girls. He was nearly positive that they had been about 5th years.  
He continued on as usual with the class, and nothing odd seemed to happen. He didn't spot either of them. One, he remembered,  
had had reddish brown, medium length hair, and the other had dark hair which was quite long. The bell rang and the class scurried   
out. Snape sighed heavily.  
  
***** (meanwhile...)  
Ron and Harry were in highly good moods. They had the best potions class ever. "Did you see him? He looked so  
desperate!" Ron chortled. "Ron, don't you find this a bit... cruel?" Hermione came up carrying her heavy bag with difficulty.  
"Are you kidding? Hello, this is Snape! This is for all the times he took points for stupid things, or for the Lupin and Sirius thing!"  
Hermione nodded and smiled sheepishly. "You're right, I suppose.." She said. "We're gonna do it again tonight, right? Hermione,   
you have the potion ready don't you?" Harry asked anxiously. "Yes, it is. I don't see why I'm even doing this for you. Although   
it is rather funny to see you two as girls..." Hermione grinned. Ron's smile faded into a scowl. "C'mon, we're gonna be late for Herblology."   
Harry said, as they ran to the greenhouses.  
*****(returning to Snape)  
Snape put down his quill. He had just finished correcting the latest essays of the 3rd year students, and was  
ready for a break. Maybe I'll take a walk, he thought, hoping vaguely to maybe find the 2 girls again.   
"Quick, here he comes!" Ron breathed to Harry. "right." Harry whispered, clearing his throat. "Oh, Rachel, I'm so glad that he hasn't   
found us yet!" Snape stopped dead in his tracks, listening intently. "Oh, I know, Harriet! I mean, if he knew who we were...." Ron had  
to stifle a laugh while saying this. Snape had had enough. He was going to catch these girls once and for all. Just as Harry began to   
swoon over Snape's "beautiful, billowing cloak" Snape appeared right before them. "come with me." he said. Harry and Ron pretended to  
look embarrassed, but when they were behind him, they gave eachother the thumbs up. They followed him down to the to the dungeons.   
Snape closed the door as they came in and began to pace the room. "I don't know what you two girls are trying to pull... Did you really  
think you'd get away with something like this?" "Please, Sir, We-er- didn't know you were, near by." Ron said meekly. Harry pretended   
to look embarrassed the lot of the time. "What are your names?" Snape asked curtly, taking out a quill and piece of parchment. "Harriet Pillsbury."  
Harry Recited. Snape wrote this down, and Ron said his 'name.' "Rachel Wilsourn." He pretended to be ahamed. Snape started to write this down,  
but stopped. "Who?" He asked, narrowing his eyes. "R-Rachel Wilsourn..." Ron said, actually nervous; he wondered if Snape knew that there was   
no such person. Of course, that was a stupid thing to make up a name. After grading papers and teaching of all of the school, Snape knew that there  
was no Rachel Wilsourn, and no Harriet Pillsbury. A sneer broke over Snape's face. I think I shall detain you here for now, Wait while I fetch the Headmaster."  
He swooped out. " What do you think, make a run for it?" Harry asked Ron. "Nah, it was fun while it lasted, it'll be even more fun when Snape finds out who we really are."  
Dumbledore and Snape walked quickly down to the dungeons. "I just know that they are using the feminine potion. I have a good Idea of their true identities as well..."  
Snape scowled. H could just see Potter and Weasley behind a scheme like this... Although they had never done such a thing before. Dumbledore had a twinkle in his eye.   
he knew who Snape was suspecting. They opened the door to Snape's office to find the two 'girls' sitting on the floor, deep in conversation. They looked up as Dumbledore  
and Snape came in. "hello, girls. Would you mind revealing your true identities?" Dumbledore said smiling. Snape thrust a bottle at them. Harry took the first drink, then passed  
the bottle to ron, who finished it off. Suddenly, their hair shortened, their faces and bodies became masculine, but not their clothes. Harry and Ron sat in the girls Hogwarts   
uniforms. They gulped. Snape looked like he was about to burst. Dumbledore seemed to find the whole situation amusing. "Let's run for it." Ron whispered to Harry.  
  
  
*Most character's belong to J.K. Rowling. I am merely using them for my/your amusement.* 


End file.
